Burn the bubbles and the AI too

The recently-random bits.

As we roar into the holiday season, most publications are publishing their annual gift guides and we just want to emphasize that here at CdC HQ, we are completely not above this. Given our complete embrace of pandering, we encourage you to give the gift of humor to another or to yourself. We’re a member-supported publication and we should be clear in that the interns, eat last, if you get our drift.

If you’re getting ready to travel and Barcelona Airport is on your radar, except you were thinking. “How can someone assault me like the perfume counters, but with a sparkling wine?” then you’re in luck. To celebrate 50 years of 8€ (or less) Freixenet Cordon Negro, you can now see a display and have a glass of, well, it. Or, you can just go to your flight and enjoy chewing your own saliva for a couple of hours if flying with Ryanair.

In showing that they clearly feel challenged by the news of this Cordon Negro presence, Singapore Airlines is now serving Roederer’s Cristal in First Class and is the only airline in world to offer it. Obviously, passengers will have some tough choices to make for their sparkling wine flying options in the months to come.

Bored with the “beer” sommeliers? Underwhelmed by “water” sommeliers? Beyond tired of those pushy hotel “towel” sommeliers upselling you on the “plush” shower mat? Well then, perhaps you should just scoot on down the road to meet the dog sommelier. Things, will never smell the same.

From our small yet potent Bureau of Good News comes word that one of the largest glass bottle makers, has just fired up their newest furnace which is 100% electric. Unlike Billy Joel’s curiosity about “the fire” and “who started” it, glass furnaces can’t ever be turned off and this change will reduce their emissions by a whopping 60%. Take that plastic bottles!

Remember that if The Pope signs your whiskey, you don’t hold on to those bottles, you sell them buggers and sell ‘em big! Go Holy or go Home.

Currently being screamed from our Department of Wake the Fuck Up, it seems that the price of coffee is going, yes, up… AGAIN! How much more can the market bear? That depends on how sleepy and detached from their jobs people are willing to be #quietquitting. The pending intersection of this price hike and Daylight Savings in the spring are going to be a recipe for death however.

Hey, maybe if coffee is getting pricey, it’s about time to revisit tea? No, seriously ‘cos like, no one is really drinking it any more. It’s just there, waiting to caffeinate you up and yet, you ignore it. It’s not the same vibe? Well, yeah, it just ain’t.

It appears that

Tatty Macleod

has recently been humiliated in a wine shop. But what is the pairing for the wine you are buying? A glass. No, but what will the food be? The drinker is English. There will be no food. At times it’s impossible to believe that only 35km of water separates England from France.

And lastly, we leave you with one of the most amazing things to ever be invented, a doddering AI grandmother to waste the time of phone scammers. It only took a couple of years and billions of dollars, but finally someone has come up with a practical application for AI, which is to waste the time of very specific people.

Until we meet again, up in the cul of the cuvée.